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archives

in my words

This category contains 19 posts

i shine if you shine

“stand where you are. we let all these moments pass us by . . .” life is beautiful by vega 4. the year is winding to an end. or perhaps racing and screeching is the way it is heading out. however we describe it. however fully scheduled the remaining days of 2011. this time of … Continue reading

Eminem in my ears

All I can think of as I head east in this cab is Eminem… Really. His lyrics. His strength in perseverance… Poverty and addiction as much a death sentence as what I’m facing… He had to see himself as greater than the world expected… Didn’t it start with his faith? His belief – in himself. … Continue reading

survivor stories.

survivor stories.  perhaps that is what my stories have become. it is a new category for me. a graduation of sorts. i faced the cancer. treated it.  shrunk the tumors.  and now i am a survivor.  i mean, i still have to get the scan next week.  and hear what dr z. has to say … Continue reading

steve jobs

steve jobs. i never knew you. like most of us. we just know about you. we benefited from your visionary spirit. your big dreams paved the way for how we live life. how we listen to music. how we communicate. the breadth and scope of your influence is endless. bigger than most of us realize, … Continue reading

full circle

i have so much to say. all the time. even when i don’t open my mouth. even when i don’t put it down in words. the thoughts in my head come full circle. a constant challenge to filter the fear from the resolve. process the emotions. try to live in the moments. enjoy the good … Continue reading

check in. check up. check out

I’ve been keeping a little to myself lately. keeping close to my inner circle. a little quiet. on vacation last week with my family. fire island. my summer home. heading back there today after treatment. i’m a little more emotional as the summer draws to a close. round 4 found my reserve of tears. I … Continue reading

dukes up

so here we go again. fists up. gut strong. breathing. slowly in and slowly out. breathing. i spend so much time talking about how it’s not that bad. and how i’m feeling strong. not knocked out. finding my rhythm. but the week before the chemo treatments is a little intense. it’s the time i need … Continue reading

too good to be true

the word is cancer. its my sign. the crab. if i’m honest about it, i always had mixed feelings about the name of that sign for my birthday in june. for whatever reason the word is electric. a jolt. means something in our culture. something evil and scary and deadly. i get it. i’m sure … Continue reading

Beach Circle

the room of shade is up. enough sand today as the ocean calms. waves still big. but gentle. yellow flag. perfect. the beach circle began with yoga. moms and dads and friends and kids. amy talking us through. jason lending a hand. swimming. beading. volley ball for some. it’s the moments. it’s the little things. … Continue reading

Thought of the day

the routine is down. third time a charm. get up. deep breath. meditate. pack a bag. and off to Sloane Kettering for the chemo treatment. today I only packed a small bag. today I am not wearing my wig. today the thought of the day from Oprah: may the journey be as sweet as the … Continue reading